That is what my lovely co-author asked me back in late 2024. She also said, “I think we should do it, to which I also laughed out loud at the thought of me (not her) doing it. Writing articles is my equivalent of climbing Kilimanjaro. I have climbed that … not yet. So why would I even imagine writing a book?
As a dyslexic whose particular struggle is large forms of text as well as memory (menopause is no picnic for my short-term memory), my immediate reaction was made of practical “can I really do this” as well as observing in me the casting of social norms around what is and is not possible for the neurodivergent and menopausal woman, I see myself as. This has been a lesson in the skill of writing and producing a book of some sort, but also so much more. Because of this, I thought it useful to share as we ready ourselves to launch it out into the world for others to read and make use of.
Next. Should I? Well, there’s a thought. On the subject of menopause, I have felt there is a sense of lethargy around the topic. Many writers, authorities, and speakers are subject matter experts, so why is another book, resource or outlet needed? Why, because there is always room for unique perspectives that come with lived experience. For both Karine and I this was and still is paramount, along with timing. There is little written or talked about the intersectionality of our brains, minds and hormones at this stage in life. And so, if not now, when? Are we any better or worse placed to tell our stories through the specific lens of our combined professional experience and practices? In our humble opinions, no. Alongside this, we were both supporting clients navigating unfamiliar hormonal experiences and journeys. And the resources we used were brilliantly informative; they proved to be a barrier as they weren’t especially accessible. Once we jumped this hurdle, it was next to pathom how. This is where our own unique minds and menopause were our greatest friends and guidance.
So… how could we?
We contracted and agreed that we would communicate openly and be considerate of each other’s feelings, commitments and experience as our north stars. We had regular connecting time between us, sometimes fixed times, not so inevitably that meant our initial “this might take a few months” took, in fact, 14 months. In practical terms, it was also fitting around our practices and wider lives; nonetheless important, but not the only thing we were trying to accomplish. For me personally, that released the pressure that my dyslexic traits would have usually revelled in. It was also driven by us being honest and clear about why we were doing this. We shared our own reasons, but in truth, it needed to.
We began with what we felt was missing from the resources we had available to us, and far from there being too little, there was an abundance, so much so that it didn’t speak to the accessibility we wanted and needed. Our minds and bodies didn’t have it in us to wade through hundreds of pages of heavy text, scroll through endless options of platforms or be a physical form that might be in danger of languishing on a bookshelf – unread and unsed. Building out the framework of the chapters really was the coat hooks that we were then able to hang our writing from. What I learnt the most was that my curiosity was my greatest ally and strength, from starting with the questions we wanted answering to being resilient that the outcome will indeed come, not just as expected, but likely differently, and much improved. We approached this project with kindness and a deep shared understanding that we were creating something we had wished existed sooner, to ease and to celebrate the neuromenopausal experience for those to come.
Deadlines became fluid concepts. Hyperfocus sessions were followed by times when neither of us could nor wanted to give it focus. What I believe we found was that our differing styles towards learning and work meant we offered a counterbalance if energy, time or motivation was lacking. I found that in wanting to understand how Karine’s brain and way of working thrived in this experience, I learnt more about my own than I would have ever imagined.
We always came back to the Why….
The why this book matters. As neurodivergent people, we already experience the world differently. We don’t intend to speak on behalf of wider intersectionality as its facets are like diamonds, almost limitless. However, what we can speak to is that menopause can intensify that difference — sometimes in challenging ways, sometimes in liberating ones. When society doesn’t talk about these experiences, it is easy to feel other, invisible or wonder if you are somehow the only one. You are not. We are not. We wanted to come to the subject from a place of sharing and not telling.
Unique Minds, Unique Menopause was consciously designed to meet readers exactly where they are as much as possible. You don’t have to read it from start to finish or, in fact, in any order at all. Dip into what you need. Move at your own pace. Our readers and users needed to have the space to pause, reflect, jot and scribble things down, all the while deciding to return to it whenever they feel compelled to. Inside, you’ll find:
- Understanding of different types of sensitivity
- Clear explanations of hormonal changes and midlife fluctuations
- Nutrition, lifestyle, and key nutrient guidance
- Reflections, prompts, and meaningful questions
- Work adaptations, peer support, and real-life examples
- Practical tools and additional resources
But it’s only for neurodivergent women, then? (Spoiler: More People Than You Think)
Yes, indeed, it is for neurodivergent women in perimenopause or menopause. But, and here’s the big but, it’s also for those women who feel hypersensitive or overwhelmed, those who suspect their brains have always worked a little differently. It’s also for partners, friends, families, employers, HR professionals, and managers who want to create more inclusive environments for women to thrive. More than half the population will experience menopause; the rest will live and work alongside someone who does. This is not just a “women’s issue.” It is a human one.
Finally……we learned that collaboration is less about perfect alignment and more about generous flexibility. Most importantly, we discovered that creating something meaningful while navigating our own neurological and hormonal shifts was not only possible — it was powerful. Menopause strips away the unnecessary. Neurodivergence invites honesty. Together, they make it very hard to write anything that isn’t real. So, this book aims to show the good, the hard, and everything in between. Offering up understanding, practical strategies, and tools to help readers speak up for themselves and build support networks that actually work towards transformation as you define it. Because growth doesn’t always happen at speed.
I hope you love and use it as much as we do, in as unique a way as you and your own experiences.